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This isn’t going to be your average movie review.  I won’t try to break down the meaning in the movie or tell you that such-and-such had an Oscar-worthy performance (though, in my opinion there were some). I won’t even discuss the cinematography or the artistic moments in the movie.  I want to talk about the message because I believe that is what Tyler Perry wanted us to get from the movie.

Let me start by saying this:

This colored girl has had enuf of hiding behind the mask that grins and lies; so, I am gonna get this out (and I am sure more will follow).

I have always been the one trying to be strong for everyone else.  For [insert number] years I have smiled, done the right thing, loved hard, worked hard, achieved much … only to end up with the bomb laying in my lap.  It blows up every time. Seeing “Tyler Perry’s For Colored Girls”made me  realize how scarred I am.  The stories of each of the ladies spoke to me…and not because I KNEW someone that it had happened to.  The someone it happened to was me.  Enabler. Rape. Molestation. Abortion. Betryal. Cheating. Sexual promiscuity. Adultery. Divorce.  (those last ones weren’t in the movie, but they are me).

I realized watching the movie that I have never dealt with these issues.  They are  bags I carry around.  I don’t want anyone to see them, but I expect them to understand how my decisions, actions and reactions are shaped by them.  I want the scars to be invisible, but I want people to accept me for them.

It doesn’t work like that.

So, I am opening my bags and letting all these things out. I am being transparent and will work on dealing with each and every scar. I remember a time I tried. I told someone very close to me that I realized I had never had a real relationship before my marriage.  Their response: “I knew you were a slut.”

I packed my bags and tucked all the pain and scars back in it and shoved it to the back of the closet … to that cold, dark place where no one dares to go.

But I am pulling it back out … taking this one day at a time …

I am going to do as Phylicia Rashad challenged Kimberly Elise in the movie. I am going to help other girls and women not “lose their stuff” because they are so busy grinning and lying behind the  mask.

That’s what this movie is all about … impacting change in the lives of colored women who have reached the end of their rainbow.

Check out related stories about Tyler Perry’s “For Colored Girls.”

Check out the black male take on “For Colored Girls.