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2017 is definitely Tiffany Haddish‘s year.

Not only was she the breakout star in the summer hit Girls Trip, she made history this fall on Saturday Night Live and dropped her first cable stand-up show on Showtime. While she is prepping for a slew of new movies to come out next year, she is also planning to drop her memoir, The Last Black Unicorn.

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As to be expected, in her upcoming book, she is keeping it 100.

According to PEOPLE, who received an exclusive first look, it’s pretty clear that the 37-year-old star has come a long way, admitting that she was abused by her mother who was diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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“I was told every day I’d never be nothing,” she says. “Now I look in the mirror and say, ‘Tiffany Haddish, I love and approve of you.’ It was all worth it.”

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Haddish also writes that the abuse worsened after her mother was involved in a car accident that caused her brain damage.

“After the accident, oh my God, she would say the worst things to me, like ‘You look like your ugly ass daddy, I hate him. I hate you.’”

“She couldn’t get all her words out, so she’d just punch me. Just full on. Because of her I can take a punch like nobody’s business. Teachers would ask, ‘Why’s Tiffany’s lip busted?’ I didn’t say anything. As bad as she was to me, I still couldn’t help but love her.”

 

“My mom is still alive, in a mental institution,” she explains in the book.

However, Haddish is clear: She still loves her mother and wants to take care of her.

“My goal is to get enough money to buy a duplex. I want to put her in one of the units and hire a full-time nurse to take care of her. Then I want to get her whatever medications she needs so she can be my mama again. Honestly, that’s all I really want in life.”

The comedienne also opens up about her abusive ex-husband, who she married and divorced twice.

“The relationship got violent. Once at a comedy festival, Tom Green comes over and he is making me laugh so hard. My ex-husband grabbed me. He was like ‘It’s time to go now.’ I had a knot on the side of my head from where he slammed me into the wall and marks on my throat where he’d dug in his nails. When I got onstage, everyone could tell I had been beaten. All those people wanted to help, but all I could do was push them away, and then go back to the dude that was abusing me. Why? Maybe I didn’t know any other way to be loved.”

This is deep. We can’t wait to get our hands on this book!

The Last Black Unicorn hits bookstores on December 5.

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Tiffany Haddish Reveals She Wants To Care For Her Mentally Ill Mom, Despite Years Of Abuse  was originally published on hellobeautiful.com