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By Dr. Dip

After about a year of dancing salsa, I learned one of my biggest life lessons. The rules of salsa dancing apply to relationships. Prior to dancing salsa, I thought I had some idea about what women want and how to be a good partner in a relationship. Well, I had it all wrong!

Several years ago, I read an excellent book entitled “The Five Love Languages,” by Gary Chapman. In this book, he detailed the five ways that people love: Affirmation, Gifts, Acts of Service, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. Since we are all unique human beings, we each prioritize our Five Love Languages differently. In my past relationships, I probably offered affirmation, gifts, and acts of service (when time permitted). I thought I was doing pretty good! Nope! I was wrong!

During my salsa lessons and our dance socials, I couldn’t figure our why these women were always so excited. I’d never seen women so excited about anything (except for shoe shopping). Then the light bulb went off! Dancing is a relationship. Typically, the man is the leader and the woman is the follower. But before the woman follows the gentleman, she must trust him. During the dance, we communicate through non-verbal communication (eye contact and hand signals). If we are in closed position, the leader has his arm on the lady’s back and the lady has her hand on the leader’s shoulder. Often times, the follower feels appreciated because the leader is focusing all of his attention on her. After the dance, the dancers compliment each other and give thanks for the dance. And the new dancers usually reach out to the more advanced dancers to practice outside of the classroom environment to improve their skills.

I can’t remember the exact day, but the light bulb went off in my head! While dancing salsa, we practice all of The Five Love Languages: Affirmation-complimenting the lady after the dance, Acts of Service-practicing new moves during or after class, Quality Time – giving the lady our undivided attention while dancing, Physical touch-both dancers maintain physical contact during the song, and Gifts-we exchange the joy of dance. In the past, at best, I only offered two out of the five Love Languages (and I felt like that was a struggle). On the dance floor, I completely enjoy giving all of The Five of the Love Languages! Salsa dancing has taught me a new love language. Now let’s see what I’ll learn from Bachata dancing……….

Interested in learning the Love Language of Salsa Dancing? If you haven’t danced before, please come join us! You might just learn Salsa, Bachata, Merengue and the Five Love Languages.

Come out and join us to expose yourself to the wonderful world of Latin Dance. Check out my Free Salsa Social at Upscale Restaurant & Lounge (every 1st and 3rd Tuesday of the month), Charlotte Latin Dance’s

Free Salsa Social at Villa Antonio’s on South Boulevard (last Tuesday of each month), or Eric’s Monthly

Social (1st Saturday of the month) World Dance Center’s Wednesday Salsa Socials. Next month, on

November 11th, dancers from across the Carolinas will come to Charlotte for an event called the Carolinas

Converge on Charlotte (find more details about all events on Facebook).

Dr. Dip

Charlotte’s Salsa Ambassador

Want to try salsa?

Free Salsa Social at Upscale Restaurant & Lounge (every 1st and 3rd Tuesday of the month)

Charlotte Latin Dance’s Free Salsa Social at Villa Antonio on South Boulevard (last Tuesday of each month)

Charlotte Mambo’s Society’s First Saturday Social

World Dance Center’s Wednesday Salsa Socials.

Beginners are welcome at all of the Salsa events.

Dr. Dip is the salsa name for our finance columnist Rashad Phillips. He typically writes about ways to save money and build wealth, but he’s such a passionate salsa dancer that he wrote the guest column for us. Read his finance columns below:

Time To Have The Talk: The Money Talk

Are You Substituting Money For Self-Worth?